Tuesday, August 22, 2006
thunderhorse...
I've said it once...I'll say it again: The sheer stupidity of Staten Islanders never ceases to amaze me. Could I be referring to the man who allowed his wife to drive off a cliff with his two daughters in the back seat so she could commit suicide? No. Am I talking about those leaders of hate crime who decided to spray a swastika on the Jewish temple...backwards, thus signifying peace? No. We all know that the people on Staten Island are just plan dumb. A feature summed up so elegantly through the use of the Island's official slogan: Fuck. That's right, from the mall to the beach, at church and on the street; no other word is spoken more frequently and unnecessarily. And don't think it's just the adults. Oh no! Little girls on cell phones, wiggers with big pants; they are all full of colorful language thanks to the wonderful home environment their ever attentive parents have created for them. Proof? How about this?
Only a player on a Staten Island team could cause ESPN to use a 5 second delay for the Little League World Series.
QUICK NOTE: Man, all those meteorologists were 100% right last year. This IS a terrible hurricane season. Good thing the oil companies raised their prices or we'd be dealing with a shortage of oil right now and gas prices would be high. Wait what? There have been no hurricanes? There's a shortage on oil anyway? Gas is over 3 bucks a gallon? OK. If you work for an oil company or are a meteorologist please come to my apartment so I can personally punch you in the mouth and piss in your eyes. Douche bags...all of them.
Finally, Max Mayfield who apparently is our "Hurricane Chief" as the dumbest greatest news organization in the world CNN puts it predicts a "mega-disaster." When? "I don't know whether that's going to be this year or five years from now or a hundred years from now." Way to be specific Max. I love these idiots who use big scary words like mega, ultra, and super to denote storms or catastrophes of immense proportions and then give the most ambiguous timeline on when they will occur. Well it's been my experience to believe that a mind-blowing-catastrophe will occur in 2276 when the bull shit spewing from everyone's mouth causes the earth to vomit on the moon. And Max would it be smart of me to go into the subway if your "mega-disaster" hit New York? "The subways are going to flood. Some people might think 'Hey, I'll go into the subways and I'll be safe.' No, they are going to flood." Thanks Max, I had no idea subways could flood despite the huge gratings on the street and tunnels. At least Staten Island and Jersey would get a needed power washing.
I've said it once...I'll say it again: The sheer stupidity of Staten Islanders never ceases to amaze me. Could I be referring to the man who allowed his wife to drive off a cliff with his two daughters in the back seat so she could commit suicide? No. Am I talking about those leaders of hate crime who decided to spray a swastika on the Jewish temple...backwards, thus signifying peace? No. We all know that the people on Staten Island are just plan dumb. A feature summed up so elegantly through the use of the Island's official slogan: Fuck. That's right, from the mall to the beach, at church and on the street; no other word is spoken more frequently and unnecessarily. And don't think it's just the adults. Oh no! Little girls on cell phones, wiggers with big pants; they are all full of colorful language thanks to the wonderful home environment their ever attentive parents have created for them. Proof? How about this?
Only a player on a Staten Island team could cause ESPN to use a 5 second delay for the Little League World Series.
QUICK NOTE: Man, all those meteorologists were 100% right last year. This IS a terrible hurricane season. Good thing the oil companies raised their prices or we'd be dealing with a shortage of oil right now and gas prices would be high. Wait what? There have been no hurricanes? There's a shortage on oil anyway? Gas is over 3 bucks a gallon? OK. If you work for an oil company or are a meteorologist please come to my apartment so I can personally punch you in the mouth and piss in your eyes. Douche bags...all of them.
Finally, Max Mayfield who apparently is our "Hurricane Chief" as the dumbest greatest news organization in the world CNN puts it predicts a "mega-disaster." When? "I don't know whether that's going to be this year or five years from now or a hundred years from now." Way to be specific Max. I love these idiots who use big scary words like mega, ultra, and super to denote storms or catastrophes of immense proportions and then give the most ambiguous timeline on when they will occur. Well it's been my experience to believe that a mind-blowing-catastrophe will occur in 2276 when the bull shit spewing from everyone's mouth causes the earth to vomit on the moon. And Max would it be smart of me to go into the subway if your "mega-disaster" hit New York? "The subways are going to flood. Some people might think 'Hey, I'll go into the subways and I'll be safe.' No, they are going to flood." Thanks Max, I had no idea subways could flood despite the huge gratings on the street and tunnels. At least Staten Island and Jersey would get a needed power washing.
// posted by Chester @ 12:46 PM 
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© 1999-2013 pazzesco.
© 1999-2013 pazzesco.